When I decided to take a vow of silence for one year, I really meant it. Four months into my year-long vow, I got angry at my husband and blurted. Determined to practice silence for one full year, I started over from scratch. Six months later, I have successfully maintained my vow. With only two months left, I have experienced so much benefit from this practice, that I am considering the option to extend my practice beyond one year.
I have dedicated my vow of silence to manifesting world peace. This means that it is a conscious practice. I’m not just doing it as a novelty or a personal experiment. I really believe that world peace must start with me. It must. Peace doesn’t happen “out there.” It has to happen from within myself, because everything I perceive comes from my own mind. I overlay my interpretations onto everything I experience. That means that the entire world originates from my own heart. If I see violence in the world, it must come from me. That means I have to change it. It is my responsibility.
When I broke my vow of silence out of anger, it was a conscious choice. It was motivated by anger and fear. I admit it. I know that by speaking angry words, it can only come back to me in the future as something negative. I accept that I made a mistake and that I must move on with determination to perfect myself. Why? Because that is the only way I can create a world where I perceive perfectly happy beings.
I realize that this is a radical perspective that contradicts the worldview I was raised in and the worldview that the majority of people operate in. But this doesn’t mean it’s wrong. If I’m right – that world peace starts with me – then I have to prove it to myself. I am determined. This is not just a little experiment. It is a radical self-transformation motivated by the desire to change the world.